The Beginning

Hello. I’m Jessica (she/her). I’m thirty years old, I live at home with my Mum and my sister, I’m unemployed, I don’t have a career, I don’t have a car, I don’t have any significant savings, yet, right now, I feel the most abundant I have ever felt. I am rich in time, inspiration, presence, care and love. I know myself better than I ever have done before. For the first time, I am beginning to understand how to truly look after my body and my mind. How to create space where space is needed, to invite an inner knowing. How to untangle myself from self-imposed expectations and societal conventions. How to quieten the noise. And I have started writing! I thought I would start a blog to share my thoughts, rather than keeping them to myself. I have nothing to prove but I do have a lot to say. And we all have to start somewhere. So, this is my beginning…

Earth-based introduction over.  

This is where I hand over to my Soul, my heart, and in this, I welcome yours.

I will write from my heart, and I hope it connects to yours.

Welcome, and thank you, truly, for making the time in your life to arrive here with me.  

Soul-based introduction. Hello, I’m Jessica and there are two things I’d like to share with you. I care an awful lot about you, and I love you. Whoever you may be and wherever you are in the world. Know you are always welcome here and if you are here, you belong here. Belonging and connection is what grounds us. Love is what grounds us. We need each other, more than ever.

Like you have chosen to arrive here, you can choose leave. No contracts here. You are in control and your decisions will only ever be respected. Stay as long as you need. This is your space as much as it is mine.

I am so excited to share my thoughts with you and hope that they may be of use. Just the thought of that moves me. But then again, I am moved by most things. Why shouldn’t I be? We are in motion, always. And we have the gift of feeling emotion. (Energy in motion – which is something a very good friend of mine always reminds me). I ask for your grace, too, as I have never embarked on this adventure of blog-writing before, but like all creative processes, I’m sure it will surprise me, be terrible at times, glorious, indulgent, ugly, but all I can hope for is magic. And truth! Are magic and truth the same thing…?

So, back to what has led me to this moment of boundless freedom.  

I believe my purpose on Earth, in this life, is to love. Here to love. When I talk about love, I am not talking about an exclusive feeling of attraction between individuals, I’m talking about the most beautiful, abundant, sacred life force that puts the Universe in motion – a collective healing energy. A Divine power that exists infinitely within us all that we all have the potential to access, if we learn how to consciously open our hearts. I journal, and about a year ago I wrote in my journal ‘I am ready for Divine Love’. Did I know what that meant? No. Did it change my life? I think so.

I began to embody love as a daily practice, a summoning of conscious gratitude and appreciation for the world both in and around me. The beauty of this practice is that it can be summoned wherever and whenever. I realised I could love in every moment, if I remembered to. At first my life didn’t look much different from how it did before, but it certainly felt different. Now, it looks and feels so tremendously different. I love living through love.

But (and this is a big but) it is the toughest thing I have ever done. I feel like a warrior! A warrior of the heart. It is a real commitment and pretty gritty at times. The practice of opening my heart has led me to encounter the truth, and as we know, the truth isn’t easy to stomach. It can be sore. Really, really sore. We really do break our own hearts, but we must, if we are seeking true joy, ease and acceptance. If we are seeking forgiveness and healing. If we are seeking love. And if, most crucially, we want to experience what it is to be alive and truly live. I think this is what my blog is going to be about (until it isn’t!) The beautiful and tender journey towards opening the Heart.  

If you have come this far – woah, that’s amazing!!! I am so grateful. Thank you. You are incredible!

I want to make something very, very clear – I am on a journey, I do not know where I will land or where this is taking me, but my feet are firmly on the ground. I believe we’re all just trying to do our best in a tough, tough world. We are all magic and flawed and perfect, on this rainy Monday afternoon. We are all enough.

Before I finish, because I can feel it is time to finish, I would like to revisit the birth of here to love. What became here to love, started as an overwhelmingly profound sensation inside of me, which I labelled with words to try and make sense of it. Classic human. It was an expansion within my chest, as if the sun had chosen to rise and set there. It was perhaps my first, life changing revelation. I have always been really into “love” and talking about it, but I only truly became conscious of what I was feeling, what I was advocating for last year. I reckon it has been swirling and whirling in me for some time, patiently waiting. In fact, I was probably born with it. I just didn’t have the conviction, or the courage, to see it fully. Here to love, is my revolution. And I know – I really, really know – we all have our own revolution to bring to the world.

So, I invite you to consider, if you wish, what eternal truths were you born with? That have lived and live inside of you, that grow with you, and so desperately wish to be unleashed in this moment to guide you forward? Be brave, listen and feel.

Until we meet again.

With love, big big love,

Jessica x